Grant me patience
to deal with my

Monday, November 30, 2009

Flowers, Halloween, Birthday, Home-made Pizza, and a funny story!

 Just had to show off my flowers I received from Russ and Anna!
We enjoyed the beauty and brightness they brought to our home for two weeks!
Yay! Happy Halloween! Carter: bumble bee, Ben: pirate skeleton, Anna: bat girl.

 Great FUN...until the flu set in the next day!

Carter, Anna getting ready to go bowling at The Rex for Ben's 10th Birthday Party.
 Rylei...striking a pose...very cool with the hand in the pocket...really...

 Ben opening a few of his presents. He seriously LOVED all of them!
 Happy Birthday Benny! This kid truly makes our lives quite interesting!
Best Buds....for life....we hope!
Carli Meredith, Ben Wayment, Carson Meredith

 It was a GREAT...thumb-sucking day!
 Saturday evening we gave Ben his snowboard!! He's been waiting for it for forever it seems!

Sunday dinner: Home-made pizza!
We baked it on a pizza stone, I made the crust extra thick, and it was...
Well...what would've made it more perfect was less olives and lots of tomatoes!

Scrumptious....and toddler approved....very important!
 Cheers to the BEST cook EVER!!!
I know....I sure am loved....but seriously, who wouldn't love a mom who makes such delicious dinners?

Funny Story of the week:

*Sigh* BOYS! If you have a should know EXACTLY what such a statement means...

After dinner this evening, I put Carter in the bath. The kid loves bath-time! If I let him, which often I do, he would play for an hour! As I sat on the toilet watching my little Bubba play, he started "swimming" in the tub. This consists of laying on his tummy and moving his body with his hands back and forth, meanwhile, plunging his face into the water, pulling it back out...gasping..rubbing eyes...then.making eye contact with me, smiling and then saying once again, "Watch dis mom!" And then the process starts all over again! It keeps me quite entertained!

Well, after a minute or so of doing this, I notice Bubba's expression... Something has changed. As he turns onto his side, I realize that the back and forth swimming motion has...uh hmm...stimulated his little "twig".

(with a little clap of the hands) How Wonderful!

Bub makes a noise of curiosity...then tries to push it back in with his finger! Just doesn't seem to be working...most likely having an opposite effect indeed! This seems to turn the curiosity notch up just a little....ok....a lot! As he pulls on skin I am sure not made to be stretched to such degrees...and looks to be quite painful...I decide that I have finally seen enough and ask him to please stop. As I am doing so, he grabs his little unit in his fist, and yes, making a loud "Pcckewoo!" shoots his "gun" at a nearby weeble wobble trying desperately to bobble away!

Quickly, I covered my mouth to stop the laughter and turned away...if a two-year old knows he's being funny....yup....chances are, he'll do it again! Violent shootings with body parts are on my list of "Not-to-do's"!

You know...I've always wondered why men are so enthralled with macho guns and studly action-packed movies...

My son has enlightened me...

Thanks kid!

*sigh...once again...* BOYS!

Just tryin to stick with the brightly packaged plastic squirt guns now...thank you very much!

*read this story while you will most likely be posted for a limited time!

Sunday, November 22, 2009

oh...I am feeling a new post coming on....

My sister-in-law Jenny sent me a "message" on Facebook. It is a video from YouTube, and they got it from "mormon messages", "What are YOU thankful for?" I loved it so much, I watched it two times in a row, hands under my chin and smiling the whole way through! I think that wasn't enough and feel like I need to watch it again! As I was watching the video, my mind started turning....and, oh yes, I could feel the beginnings of a post coming to surface! You know you are a true blogger when you have experiences like this! So, here I go...

I LOVE to be inspired. I do. I adore inspirational movies, quotes, thoughts, commercials, programs, music, and people. I live from day to day seeking some form of inspiration. I NEED it...I THRIVE on it. Yup.

This coming Thursday, all of us will be celebrating Thanksgiving. For the last few weeks, fellow bloggers have posted many messages of what they are grateful or thankful for. I have been holding out...because I still have not managed posting Halloween pictures yet. And then our family put up the Christmas tree and the nativity set. I also cooked some 40 of the most DELICIOUS oatmeal which I ate the majority....very true. I have sent many lengthy messages on Facebook back and forth with my cousin Hannah too, which in the process, I have come closer to her and she has lifted me up. I spend too many minutes wishing I had my own sewing machine so I can make fun and adorable things for my house and kids. I stay up too late, and sleep in longer than is really necessary. And I have found an addiction to needing music, just certain songs, and I like to listen to them over and over.! I finally got pre-school going with Anna, and I enjoy every minute of reading to Carter...mostly because I wondered if he would EVER be interested in books! Oh, he is!

I was thinking today...How often do I think about where another person has come from? Will we ever really understand or fully appreciate the people around us and what their life means to them, and to the rest of us? I went visiting teahing last week. One beautifully pregnant woman I visit told us she is a recent convert to the church. Hmm, what does that mean to her, and what could that mean to me? I found out my companion has seen a counselor since she was a young adult. She told me she would never be the person she was if it wasn't for her counselors. She is so valiant and has a firm faith in Christ. With one sister we visited, as she shared her simple thoughts with us, my heart burned with the witness of the Holy Ghost. Will she ever know what those simple words meant to me? There is so much that makes up a person and who that person is and who that person will continue to become. But, upon our first meeting, all we see is the color of their eyes, how their hair is done, what clothes they are wearing, if they have kids, a dog, or whether they put up the Christmas tree before or after Thanksgiving.

The wonder of humanity is that...a person...sharing small peices of their lives...with another...bridges the gap we feel in this world at times of sorrow, sadness, feeling alone, guilt, self doubt, fear, hardship....and something amazing happens....we connect with one another, sometimes for but a moment...and we catch a glimpse of something deeper inside that person's heart and soul....and what they share might erase our own fear for something, uplift our hearts, make us smile, enlighten our mind, or give us a sense of comfort or assurance. We leave feeling....yes, INSPIRED. And doesn't seem so bad...and many times life feels indeed, like a blessing you wouldn't trade for anything.

Can I share some "pieces" of my life with you?

Two weeks ago, I was feeling very alone. All of the hurt and anger, fears, anxieties, and shadows I have been running away from because of my all came crashing back down on me. My little brother, Ben, has been with us for almost eight months now. He is a daily reminder to me that I actually DO have a mother. A mother who missed my engagement and blissful wedding with Russ, the birth of my beautiful children, my first day of college, high school track meets, the day I placed in the 800 meter in the Idaho State track meet, she missed seminary graduation, the works of art I created, there have been no phone calls where I need advice and she gives it to me freely, no moments of laughter, or smiles...

Just emptiness. And I filled that emptiness with all that I could. I lived each day and moment of my life knowing that I would never become what my own mother became to me...just a memory filled with pain.

With every dissappointment she threw at me, I turned around and filled it with something good. I moved on...and she just became the woman who gave birth to me...that's all.

Well...the past eight months, my mom's presence has been an unwelcome guest in my mind and in my life. She brings with her too much hurt and anger and questions of "Why?" And I finally decided that I could no longer "run" from her anymore. I had to face her, finally, or else I could never be able to fully embrace life and move on. And so as I was feeling very alone recently, I reached out to my family members, and asked, or more pleaded with them, to offer up their prayers in behalf of our family and the hardships we are currently facing with our guardianship of Ben.

I am not alone. So silly that I could ever feel that way. I feel I have experienced a common miracle in the responses we received. I sit here, and am AMAZED at the outpouring of strength, love, support, peace, guidance, understanding, and inspiration we have been given because loving members of our family were willing to pray for us. Never in my life, have I felt a love that has consummed my being to such a level, that I felt as if I could almost feel the unseen angels filling me up with pieces from Heaven.

What am I thankful for?

I am thankful that I am not alone. This world moves so fast that we, at times, forget to stand still, and listen to the wind blowing through the trees, the patter of the rain on our rooftops, the crunch of our shoes over the new-fallen snow, or hear the pure joy found in a child's laughter or appreciate the twinkle found in a smile. Each breath we take, that fills our lungs...the breath of life that keeps us ALIVE...could never be without the loving hands of a Father in Heaven who created all things on Earth. The wind and the rain and the glitter of snow outside my window helps remind me the He is there and that LIFE was created in this world because of LOVE. And when I can push the rest of the world away and all of its frivolous man-made counterfits for happiness, joy, peace, security.....when I push that all away and close my eyes to the secular world, then I can hope to FEEL the true glory of life...

I am a Daughter of God, spiritually begotten of the Father, who has a purpose for why I am here, and it is to stand and speak forth the knowlegde which I have gained through every life experience whether good, bad, horrible, heart-ripping, exhilarating, crushing, hurtful, fulfilling.... awe-inspiring.

And I can be Thankful, and even Grateful...for a childhood filled with horrors, for a mother who I barely know now, for the emotional trauma I experienced from watching loving parents turn to mindless, heartless monsters bound by drug addiction, and I can take every pain from my past, present, and future....and replace it with something better....and the only way I can do that is to return back to where it all began.

"I stand all amazed at the love Jesus offers me, confused at the grace that so fully He proffers me.
I tremble to know that for me He was crucified, that for me, a sinner, He suffered, He bled and died.

I marvel that He would descend from His throne divine, to rescue a soul so rebellious and proud as mine.
That He should extend His great love unto such as I, sufficient to own, to redeem, and to justify.

I think of His hands pierced and bleeding to pay the debt! Such mercy, such love, and devotion can I forget?
No, no, I will praise and adore at the mercy seat, until at the glorified throne I kneel at His feet.

Oh, it is wonderful that He should care for me enough to die for me! Oh, it is wonderful, wonderful to me!"

What makes up the "pieces" of us? Why are they there and who does it come from? Why is it so fulfilling and saving when hearts meet with hearts and both are edified to the point where life feels so precious and priceless? How can I be moved to tears when I hear my sister say on the phone, "I am so sorry for the burdens you have to bear. I wish there was something I could do to help!" Maybe I you think that maybe, just has to do with our Savior? When we feel the wind sifting through our lives, as we feel the sun warming our faces, in the still of the night when only the soft little breaths can be heard from a sleeping child...the world becomes still enough that the whispers of the Spirit testify to us of a greater purpose and plan, and despite our weariness, there is abundant strength gained from the Atonement of our older brother, Jesus Christ, who died because He loves us.

His LOVE is sufficient...

and I remain, humbly....ever thankful....

What are you Thankful for? Click here!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

O dear me!

Anna, who happens to be only 4 years old...on her way to almost 4 1/2, has been quite emotional lately! She cries about everything! Ok, so maybe the ladies can totally relate, but come on! She's just FOUR! Do I have to suffer the mood swings ALREADY?! And 8 1/2 seconds later, she's as happy as a lark! At times, it is quite frustrating...and most recently....very much hilarious!

This is what happened five minutes ago...

Carter went into the bedroom. Anna was already IN the bedroom. Uh oh! This could spell di-sas-ter! I hear someone who is very much in peril. I walk into the bedroom where both Anna and Carter are trying to play with the kitchen at the SAME time! Oh dear me! What a TERRIBLE predicament! What to do?

I ask Anna if she can please share the kitchen and take turns. I feel quite confidant that she can fulfill such a difficult task, afterall, I am preparing her for marriage someday, where she will always have to share the kitchen, bathroom, bed, and even the remote....with another boy!

This was her response:

Starting to cry...."I am DONE playin "mom and daughter" cuz Bubba jus ruins MY LIFE!" and then she stormed out the door!

I laughed my head off!!!

I love that girl...mood swings and all!
Sometimes...boys just take all the FUN out of something, eh?

Saturday, November 7, 2009

"Bedtime Routine"

Lately...the bedtime routine at our home is like this:

Clean up bedroom. Get jammies on. Brush teeth. Go pee. Carter...well, refusing to go pee. Clean up bedroom again. Read a few books. And then "one more". And then "one more". And then "one more". Crying. Why? Because mom absolutely REFUSES to read "one more"! Anna climbs in bed. Cover her up. Hugs and kisses. Carter climbs in Anna's bed. Gets pulled by any limb mom can reach over top of bunk bed. Crying. Carter in bed. Covered up. Hugs and kisses. Mom sings a "goodnight" song. And then "one more". and then "one more"! No more SONGS...mommy really CAN'T sing! Anna needs "Fluffy". Carter needs "doggie". Anna needs "Sassy". Carter needs "bear". Crying...NO MORE ANIMALS! Sniffles but kids are okay, snuggled with animals and blankets. Carter needs a drink. said no drinks until morning. More crying. Carter throws bear on the floor. Mom takes bear away...that is the rule. More crying. Carter wants bear. Mom wonders if he will ever learn. Mom gives carter the bear. Yup...Carter throws bear back on the floor! Bear gets put away until morning. Mom, at the door. Tries to shut the door. Anna needs a hug and a kiss! Mom reminds her she already got one! Anna says NO she didn't. Mom says YES she did! Crying. Mom gives Anna a hug and a kiss. Mom reminds Anna to PLEASE remember this time. Mom blows kisses. Shuts bedroom door. Lets out a huge sigh of relief. Goes to the couch and plops down. Eats something unhealthy. Hears a faint voice calling for, "Mommy!" What could it be now???

Tonight, Anna needed to ask me a very important question. I was trying to listen to what Anna was asking me, while holding Carter's legs down and explaining to him that he can't keep kicking the wall at bedtime. I couldn't understand what Anna was trying to say. I asked her to repeat it again...and again!

"Girl! I cannot figure out what you are talking about!"

"Mom, you know, weserwectshun!"


"You know mom...with yer feet and yer hands?"

Then it finally clicks, she's saying "resurrection"! Now I get it! So, Anna, what about it, I ask. She then asks me if she will have to get nails put in her feet and hands, too, when she gets resurrected. Like Jesus. I was surprised that she thought she would have to go through that too! She seemed very worried. I explained to her the Jesus was crucified, that mean people hung him on a cross, and AFTER he died, THEN he was resurrected! I told her that the only person who would be hung on a cross was Jesus. That she wouldn't have to be crucified, or anyone else. We would all die normally, and our spirits would go to Heaven, and then someday after that, we would be resurrected and our spirits and bodies would be re-united!

She heaved out a huge sigh of relief, got a big grin on her face and repeated, "Yeah! We not have to get nails in our hands and feet, just Jesus! We not have to be hunged on a cross, huh mom?"

"Nope. Just Jesus."

I'm sure glad He did what He my baby girl can be resurrected and live with Him again. I think she was pretty grateful for Jesus too....knowing that He suffered the she wouldn't have to.

After THAT conversation, I was pretty grateful for the whole "Bedtime Routine" after-all....

Good night!

Sunday, November 1, 2009


We brought home the all-too-famous SWINE FLU!!! WooHoo!!
Add that on top of a few suckers, kitkat, hershey bar, tootsie roll, pixie stick...

yup...that spells F-U-N!

*even the "flu mist" couldn't keep it away from us in time!

-pictures to be posted soon of my little trick-or-treaters...